Monday, September 12, 2005

Next Lifetime

Your energy
Feels so damn good to me
It picks me up
Don't wanna come down
Got you spinnin' all around
You need to know
I got somebody
But your beautiful
But still it ain't that type of party
-- Badu

HAS to be the most fucked up emotional situation you can ever be in.

Err'thang is right.

Chemistry. So damn right. Interests. So right. Flow. So gatdman right.

...but you kinda in the middle of something. *ahem* Ok, ok. You're in a relationship.

That shit blows me, because this type of shit used to always seem to happen to me.

I was famous for havin' some ill timing when it came to my loins.

Me and Dennis messed with each other for years. How long was it? Had to be about 10 good years. On and off.

When I had a boyfriend, I wouldn't fuck with him.

When he had a girlfriend, I'd still fuck with him.

Hey, he'd ask, how come you refuse to cheat, but you make me cheat?

I'd sigh, and reassure him, Because you can't bear the thought of being without me.

I wasn't being arrogant. I was telling the truth.

I was his drug. I was his drink of choice. I was his equalizer. I was the neutralizer. I was his balance. I was...I was....the best piece of ass he ever had.

Oh, how sweetly I would kiss Dennis. Oh, so sweetly. I'd awaken his body with kisses. Wow, he loved kisses.

I knew how to touch him. What to say to him. How to hold him.

We'd slow drag in his living room to Keith Sweat and Gerald Levert, and he'd make me all wet and sticky at the thought of fluffy lips cushioning my clit.

*readjusting myself*

And then one day...he told me he was getting married.

Huh? Why?

You don't want me, he said.

I cried.

Because he was right.

Next lifetime won't be soon enough for me to hold him again though.

*raising my hand*

Ooh! Oooh! Pick me! Pick me!

Remember how you used to lean into that shit if the teacher was taking too long to pick you?

Ooooh! Pick me! Pick me!

Be gruntin' and shit.

Anyway, Alexander Foo was a big-swole boy in my 2nd grade class.

He was cock-diesel for a 7 year old. Had a big ass afro. And these puffy ass eyes that looked like he ain't never slept in his life.

...and he was black.

Don't ask me where he got that name, I'm just telling you the story.

Anyway, this little muthafucka would go up in the coat closet and eat people's lunches.

The foul shit was that he wouldn't eat ALL your lunch. Just the shit he liked. He'd leave the shit he ain't like.

On any given day, he would straight rough off about 10 lunches.

Kids be sittin' at the lunch table, crying and shit.

Teacher come over and there would be a bite out your sandwich.

A browning apple core.

Your juice would be gone.

Wiped his mouth with your napkin, and put it back in there.

Couldn't never catch that fucka doing it, but err'body knew Alexander was doing it.

Be at the table, hyperventilating,

Al-al-al-ex-AND-er ate my lunchhhhhhhhhh!

You know you had a fucked up lunch when Alexander didn't touch a gatdamned thing in it.

I wonder where that puffy-eyed, lunch bandit is now.

Oh, and he stunk too.

I guess I'll see you next lifetime...

Jeanette Robey pee'd on herself in third grade, and we still call her Pee Pee Girl.

Kids are cruel.

Speaking of which...let me go pay my water bill.


Blogger K said...

lmao! that was funny...i think there is a lunch eater in every school...

yeah i got passed over for marriage too...*sigh*...i feel your pain...

September 12, 2005 8:15 PM  
Anonymous Ms. B said...

LOVE that song...

September 12, 2005 8:37 PM  
Blogger chase said...

Yeah girl, i got passed over for marriage too....he said "i didnt think you needed me",,,,,i later came to understand that was another cop out line. JUST BE A MAN and say you made a choice. lol

September 12, 2005 11:48 PM  
Blogger **RPM** said...

Ok...I am ROLLING with laughter on this. What a great post. I agree, that situation can truly be the worst. I think, especially when the two people just can't seem to get their timing right, but want to.


I felt this one. Excellent post.

September 13, 2005 12:26 AM  
Blogger NeenaLove said...

you got me crackin' up over here!

my 'next lifetime' love knows who he is!! "...maybe we'll be butterflies..."

tragic when we know what a soul mate really is... and have lost it. ahhh... **singing** "i think i'm in love again..." (prototype by outkast) LOL...

great post!!!

September 13, 2005 4:48 AM  
Blogger Nina MM said...

@ K and Chase -- I didn't get passed over for marriage. I was in a relationship. Dennis was right. I didn't want him...for more than what he was. Warm kisses, sweet lingus, and slow drags in the living room. He wanted more. I couldn't give it to him though.

@ Ms. B, RPM, & Neena -- Chokes you up, don't it? *hitting my chest with my fist* Damn shame. LOL

September 13, 2005 9:25 AM  
Anonymous O said...

HAHAHAHA!! Funny sh*t. Cock diesel 7 year olds? Grunting to get called on by the teacher? LOL! You sure this little carjacker-in-training wasn't mixed with Korean or something? Never, ever met a n-word named 'Foo' before.

*still chuckling at the image of the 7 year roughin people off* "gimme your fruit cup, punk!" HAHA. Reminds me of that old episode of Diff'rent Strokes where Willis got his ass beat by the gooch. HA!

September 13, 2005 11:13 AM  
Blogger Amadeo said...

Funny cause my only situation like that I was never with the person...we always missed...the only chance I had my morals made me wait and it was forever too late afterwards.

I'd a beat Alexander's ass while crying myself. That lunch thing was real in the day.

September 13, 2005 12:00 PM  
Blogger Midlife Crisis said...

The man I consider my soul mate was like that thing you described. I loved that boy with an ache that I could feel..but it just wasn't enough. Not enough to make me, you know...Somehow, it always felt more right to call someone else my man.

I do know that we have shared many lifetimes together. The weird way we met and everything--it was incredible. And our shit was on and off for like ten years, too.

I still love him more than any other, but it wasn't enough love or the right kind of love...

Blessings to him.

September 13, 2005 12:12 PM  
Blogger Nina MM said...

@O -- this little monkey looked like he could bench press an ice cream truck. Pec'd out. Big ass legs. Everybody wanted him on their tug o'war team and shit. Fuckin' ridiculous. LOL We have reason to believe he's either dead or somewhere under the prison system.

@Amadeo -- my morals are convenient. LOL! Hence, many years of fuckin' D, guilt free. You shoulda hit. You can always feel guilty later.

September 13, 2005 12:41 PM  
Blogger Nina MM said...

@ Midlife

...but it just wasn't enough. Not enough to make me, you know...Somehow, it always felt more right to call someone else my man.

D was good for what he was, but I never wanted to be his woman. It never dawned on me, even in the foggiest recesses of my brain, that I would want to be his woman. I was perfectly happy with our stolen moments.

When he contracted cancer, he still wanted to make love. I was afraid of dislodging the catheter in his chest, but he just urged me to be gentle, and everything will be alright. That unnerved me a bit. I guess I feel kind of bad that I could never love him the way he wanted me to. *sigh* I only find solace in the fact that maybe she loves him as much as I wish I could have.

September 13, 2005 12:48 PM  
Blogger Anacaona said...

This was good. I just had my "Dennis" moment not to long ago. Difference is that I was mad he could not just wait for me to come around. I think he knew better than me that I probably never would.

September 13, 2005 1:18 PM  
Blogger Midlife Crisis said...

>I guess I feel kind of bad that I could never love him the way he wanted me to. *sigh* I only find solace in the fact that maybe she loves him as much as I wish I could have.

Wow. I feel it, though.

September 15, 2005 12:24 AM  
Blogger Danyel said...

This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.

September 15, 2005 10:00 AM  
Blogger Danyel said...

Sylvers. Slave. Badu. We be on the same wavelength.

September 15, 2005 10:00 AM  
Blogger Danyel said...

This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.

September 15, 2005 10:00 AM  

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