Thursday, September 15, 2005

One



One is the loneliest
Number one is the loneliest
Number one is the loneliest number that you'll ever do...
-- Three Dog Night

As people continually fail to improve on the silence, I am more and more contented in my aloneness.

I grow weary of wasted presences.

I could be very clearly going mad.

Or getting mad clear.

Hmmm...



When you see me
Tryin' to do good
It's just Jesus, Jesus in me
It's just Jesus, Jesus in me...
- The Clark Sisters

It's a new level of fat to be 400 pounds and be named after a snack.

I'll be damned if they would call me Twinkie if I was big as shit.



Let me stop.

No, fuhreal, fuhreal.

I should stop.



A new start, and new beginning, and new adventure. That's what I keep telling myself.

Exciting, yet daunting.

I'm tired of starting over though.

*sigh*



Bernadine: I give you 11 fucking years of my life and you're telling me you're leaving me for a white woman?
John Sr.: Would it help if she was black?
Bernadine: No. It would help if you were black.


Men make my soul itch.

I s'pose I let them make my soul itch, but I'll be damned if I can't scratch deep enough to relieve the irritation.

How the fuck you gon' get strong off of my fortitude, get back on your feet, and roll your new and improved ass out here post haste and get yourself another woman to grandstand with and for?

Are you serious?

Well, it happens. That's why I keep telling women to leave these fixer-upper nigrayshuns alone. Let them fix they OWN gatdamn self up. Fix up your own shit.

You won't build your house using my timber and my nails and my hammers and my sweat and my time and my skills and then don't even invite me in that muthafucka for a cool drink.

Naw. It's not going down like that.

Now I can fucks with you if you have potential and the resources to help yourself.

But outside of that, naw...you "assembly required" muthafuckas need not apply.

The Broken Wing Hospital is closed, and Dr. Millimeter cancelled her malpractice insurance, pawned her stethoscope, liquidated her assets and is somewhere suckin' the dick of a man that got his OWN shit.

Time is far spent for bullshitting.

*blank stare*

I've got to get this ball on the court. Gotta get my thang in my action.



VERB!

That's what's happenin'.

*blank stare*

Something's got to pop off for me. Soon. I realize that I'm as anxious as S about the prospect of not being able to do that which I've always done.

I didn't understand her angst until.just.now.

I'm straight trippin', boo.

Too much time on my hands, it's ticking away with my sanity
I've got too much time on my hands, it's hard to believe such a calamity
I've got too much time on my hands and it's ticking away from me
Too much time on my hands, too much time on my hands
Too much time on my hands . . .
-- Styx



Oy vey.
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5 Comments:

Blogger Amadeo said...

I'm not sure which I enjoy more the writing or the great musical references. It's like being in middle school and no one will call me an oreo.

September 16, 2005 8:34 AM  
Blogger Fresh said...

That's why I keep telling women to leave these fixer-upper nigrayshuns alone. Let them fix they OWN gatdamn self up. Fix up your own shit. Girl you ain't said nothing but a word!!! VERB...that's what's happenin'!

September 18, 2005 3:50 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Just like KANYE said.

"Get Down Girl! GO HEAD! Get Down!"

I agree. Do NOT go for that fixer upper bullsheIT. You WILL be unappreciated and left in the dust.

They make my motherfucking soul itch too honey. Its like...sometimes I think they aint even motherfucking HUMAN. Hatched from eggs on some far away planet and sent to earth to make us run for the goddamn calamine lotion ferreal.

And then I got all these people telling me I am a man in a womans body. That shits the itchiest of all!

September 20, 2005 12:40 PM  
Blogger Black Wombmyn Chat said...

Speak it... That's all I can say.

September 21, 2005 8:11 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Hey Nina, just dropping by to see if you had written anything new. Hope you are well.

September 30, 2005 11:28 PM  

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